My name is Fogus Punch.

For the past five years, I have directed the Epsilon astronomy observation laboratory, whose telescope is hooked up to five satellites, allowing us to observe both outer space and our planet 24 hours a day.

On March 24, I made a discovery so extraordinary that the authorities and the world at large refuse to believe it, despite my irrefutable proof. Nevertheless, I tell you: THERE IS LIFE ON THE SUN!

This may seem unbelievable, but on the morning of March 24 at 6:00 GMT, I observed a ship taking off from the sun and landing on our planet. It released creatures here—creatures of many different appearances. Some look vaguely animal-like, others are tribal-looking, and still others look like something out of a carnival.

These creatures have spread to the four corners of the Earth in an apparently random fashion. I’ve tracked them down in Austria, in a small village in Italy, in the American desert, in a stadium and even in a prison!

These creatures have a playful temperament, and like to hide in order to send out a sort of solar wind. When this wind touches human beings, it transforms them, giving them some extraordinary abilities. Since I myself have been exposed to this radiation for a few seconds, I’ve been able to study its effects on me.

The effects of the solar wind are not the same in all the humans it has affected; some start doing acrobatics, others voltige. Others show incredible juggling abilities. I have also seen that the solar wind can affect objects and costumes, animating them as though they were alive.

Since the morning of March 24, I have had a single mission: to track down and find these solar creatures from my observatory. Everything has been filmed, recorded and written down in my reports, and I am working day and night to accomplish my new task. It is time for the entire world to know!

Fogus Punch